Apprehension. Confidence. Fear. Excitement. Doubt. Mostly, doubt. Its all there in my head, its all running around, the course is zooming around my head in fast forward, over and over. Can't stop. Can't wait. Paralyzed. Ready to drop the hammer. Scared the hammer won't be found.

Its that feeling, on the line, when you are so nervous you can hardly breathe. Your heart hammers in your chest, the butterflies are practically in your throat. Poles are shaking, even planted in the snow. Your whole body is shaking, so nervous, so strung-out, any second now and you'll false start. Five ... beep, beep, beep, beeeeeep. Two strides into it and you've completely forgotten the butterflies of the start; your adrenaline is now working with you to make every stride as much as it can be. Hundredths of a second count, here, a tenth could separate 16th from 23rd. That feeling-- I live for that feeling.

Snowsnowsnowsnowsnowsnowsnowsnow!!!!!!

Its finally winter here; we got lots of snow last night. I took pictures, but my computer decided to have an identity crisis and no longer turns on, so I can't post these lovely pictures of snow everywhere. You'll just have to take my word for it.

The ski fest is on for real, now, there are ski company folks everywhere, and tons of people everywhere, and I think I may have preferred this town when I had it to myself. Although I definitely prefer it with snow on the ground! This also means that the races are ON, which is a big relief, because I didn't exactly come out here for a vacation... although its been a fun one! I can't WAIT to put the hammer down!!

Spring Skiing

Today I skied for a Long Time. Suffice it to say that I had to eat a lot of food afterwards, and everyone else had left the plateau except for one Finnish guy, who luckily felt like giving me a ride. Conditions would have been great in April. Absolutely FANTASTIC spring skiing. Too bad its November...

However, the forecast is calling for up to six inches tomorrow night and constant snow through Tuesday. They make the call Tuesday at noon whether or not they'll hold the supertours. If they cancel the races, I know someone who will be a very unhappy camper.

I ran into Freddy B today. I almost didn't recognize him without the Brikos. I tried to take a picture of both of us, but I was too short to fit into the frame, so I had to ask someone else to take the picture. Incompetent? Quite possibly.

Today was a haiku day. The morning's haiku:

My skis kick and glide
I love extra blue weather
Effortless skiing

The afternoon's haiku:

Huffing and puffing
Slower than cold molasses
I don't belong here

I'm tempted to come up with a new haiku every day, but I don't think I'm that creative.

Skiing!!

I was close to a breaking point. I could see the snow. I had to get to it. So, I rented a bicycle. The poles I could tape to the frame, but I later found out that the true purpose of the helmet was to protect my head from being bludgeoned to death by my skis while riding uphill.





Its not perfect, but its early season skiing, and its damn nice. And I ran into Sam Morse, who is now skiing with the national guard. Small world.

I know I should be all down about there not being any snow here, but I don't think I mind. I went for a thoroughly satisfying rollerski into Yellowstone, and while I wouldn't call it fun, because rollerskiing in mid-November doesn't warrant that word, I felt better after that workout than I have in a long time. I don't mean physically, I've been riding the rollercoaster in terms of how my body has felt all fall, but mentally and emotionally, I was right where I wanted to be. It was hard not to feel inspired by the scenery of Yellowstone park, and the conditions were pretty perfect for rollerskiing, since the road is closed to motorized traffic this time of year.

After about a half hour, I realized how silent it was aside from me. All I could hear were the click of poles, the squeak of my bindings, and occasionally the breeze in my ears when it picked up. Unlike yesterday, when my brain was running overtime for no reason during my run, my head was utterly empty. No song in my head, no story playing out, no plans being made, no mantras about technique, just an awareness of my body and its setting. It was almost trance-like, except that I felt ultra aware of everything around me.

The cool part was when I saw a herd of elk (I think they were elk--some sort of leggy quadruped), crossing the road. They saw me and all stopped, so I stopped. We spent a while looking at each other, and then both decided that neither of us were a danger to each other, so kept on, the rollerskier on the road, the elk following the river that paralleled the road.

Just an excellent day, overall. I think Keither Urban says it right.

I got the one I love beside me
My troubles behind me
I'm alive and I'm free,
who wouldn't wanna be me

West Yellowstone

I'm here! The "real" ski season for me has really begun. Except for the minor fact that I'm not skiing, yet. I mean, I would be skiing if I could. In fact, I'm pretty sure that up on the plateau there is skiable snow, but I'm broke and under 25 which means I can't get up there until somebody else goes up there, and takes me along for the ride.

Yesterday when I got in, there was no snow in town, and Tim Weston (the coach at Bridger ski foundation in Bozeman, and is originally from Fairport so I felt ok with cold-calling him to get a ride) decided that we may as well drive up to the plateau. there was maybe 1-2 inches of fresh stuff, and some harder snow underneath that, but nobody has been skiing there yet. Maybe 3 inches total. Skiable with rock skis and a sense of adventure, maybe.

Last night it snowed a bit, but by now its mostly burned off the roads and sidewalks. I went for a run on the rendezvous trails, and there was full snow coverage, but it needs another couple inches to be skiable. The trails are in great condition, no potholes or rocks or dog shit, so I believe fasterskier when they say that 3-4 inches will allow for grooming. Back into the waiting game...